I would like to ask your advice. I have two sons one is 20 and one is 22. The 22 yr old wont get a job. He is
disrespectful too.
He had a good job and bought a new car. He has started to establish credit on his own. Everything
was OK till he started to spend time with some with some of his new friends that are on parole.
Two months ago my husband their (Step-Dad) started charging the boys 6 dollars a day rent. They were so mad about being charged rent. All they do is complain. The 22 yr old has not paid at all so far. My husband bought the 22 yr old new tires for his new car one month ago. ($500.00) He was suppose to start a new job and pay his rent and pay back the new tire loan he took from my husband. He has been unemployed now two months. He says he is not getting a job. He says his car is going to be repossessed.
He has gone out of state two times in the past month. One of the parolees was with him...he got written permission to leave the state with my son. We have asked him to move out of the house and he says we will have to remove him. He wont leave home. I fear for the worst and I suggested he go with his natural Dad who lives on the East Coast. He wont go. He has total disregard for myself and my husband. What in the heck should I do?
What can I do? I realize I have spoiled them. Even their Dad says I have given them too much. Now I am suffering for it. The verbal abuse and total disrespect is way out of control.
Please Help.
Life is full of choices. If you choose to live with and take care of your sons forever, then you will just have to put up
with them as you always have.
If you choose to live with your husband and enjoy your horses and get on with your life through this interesting stage of your existence, then you will have to take a stand regarding your sons. If they refuse to move out and make homes for themselves, you might have to move out on them and sell your house.
Unless they are handicapped in some way and need a mother's care forever, they will actually enjoy their lives more and feel a lot better after you have made them move out. Making them pay rent doesn't solve the problem. They must be out on their own, completely.
This doesn't mean cutting them off from all contact. Keep in touch but don't have them there underfoot all the time. You
might find you miss them after you get them to move out, but you'll find other things to fill your lives. Children in the
home are natural but having grown men around who do not want to cooperate with family customs is pure punishment.
Good luck.
GG
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