There is no way that you won't worry about your daughter, at 18, or any other age. Through time, though, you will come to realize that worry never did any good and only ruined your life. If you can teach yourself not to worry, but just to accept the certainty of uncertainty, you'll be doing everyone a big favour.
Your tendency is just a normal maternal feeling. We never get over the feeling of wanting to protect our children, no matter how old they are.
But by now you have had her in your care for many years, during which time you have taught her your own standards by precept and example. You've told her everything you ever will tell her about how to order her life and face it's challenges, and you will have shown her, in the way you live your own life, what you deem to be important.
Now is the time to let her find out if all this teaching will see her through her own dilemmas. No life is going to be smooth sailing. She will meet problems that never even occurred to you while you were looking after her. There has been no way that you could prepare her for this 21st century. Her world is not the same as yours has been, so all you can do is trust that the values you instilled will hold true.
Share experiences with her. Live in her world, not in the past. Keep in contact. If she wants to tell you what's up with her, that is her prerogative; don't pry. And don't try to keep on giving her advice, unless she very specificly asks for it. Don't preach, or teach. Your time for that is over. Now your role is to make sure she knows you love her, unconditionally, and are not judging her.
If she seems to be judging you, forgive her. She is young; you are the mature person here.
If she comes to grief, your role then will be to stand by her uncritically, and help out wherever possible. Meanwhile, trust her.
Yours truly,
GG
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